i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
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