I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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