4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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