I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
