so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
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I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
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you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
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