yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
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