I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
How naked do you want me to be?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
