I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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