I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Come on in and take your pants off
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