So drunk, too bad you don't want this
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I just found puke in my bra..
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
