Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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