This girl is more easily done than said...
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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