He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
