so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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