He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
should my penis look like a turkey
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
