hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize