i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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