ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
