I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
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you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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