fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize