can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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