Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize