Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
