So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me