After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
