i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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