She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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