Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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