How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
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