pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize