Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
