It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize