I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
