idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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