Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike

  (1-917): View more from New York City

  this is mike. we're done.

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  (917): I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike (1-917): this is mike. we're done. http://tfl.nu/abns
  Replies (21) Good night (883) Bad night (2992)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I need a shot of tequila, and quick death

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  (586): I need a shot of tequila, and quick death http://tfl.nu/qciv
  Replies (5) Good night (704) Bad night (889)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers

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  (860): but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers http://tfl.nu/f9xh
  Replies (32) Good night (3049) Bad night (1319)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.

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  (401): Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified. http://tfl.nu/2va0
  Replies (27) Good night (5165) Bad night (935)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.

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  (713): We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10. http://tfl.nu/4t0m
  Replies (16) Good night (5814) Bad night (898)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.

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  (240): i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with. http://tfl.nu/66qi
  Replies (8) Good night (3984) Bad night (1012)
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  (562): View more from California

  Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser

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  (562): Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser http://tfl.nu/nnjn
  Replies (3) Good night (2334) Bad night (958)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though

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  (614): Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though http://tfl.nu/2fqg
  Replies (6) Good night (1201) Bad night (518)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.

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  (901): She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid. http://tfl.nu/lor2
  Replies (3) Good night (1120) Bad night (558)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking

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  (503): ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking http://tfl.nu/1308
  Replies (6) Good night (1433) Bad night (464)
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  (916): View more from California

  1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.

  (707): View more from California

  *roof

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  (916): 1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor. (707): *roof http://tfl.nu/ph25
  Replies (6) Good night (1820) Bad night (549)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me

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  (617): The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me http://tfl.nu/mmd5
  Replies (8) Good night (1131) Bad night (428)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo

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  (914): Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo http://tfl.nu/y87c
  Replies (6) Good night (366) Bad night (650)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.

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  (724): No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face. http://tfl.nu/bjr7
  Replies (2) Good night (603) Bad night (344)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.

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  (563): No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever. http://tfl.nu/wpdr
  Replies (2) Good night (600) Bad night (306)

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