What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
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