The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
