She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
