Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
