You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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