is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
They should really pass out barf bags in church
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
