Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Randomize
