Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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