Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
So vagazzling was a success
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
