how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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