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• (702): View more from Nevada

  Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...

  (1-702): View more from Nevada

  ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha

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• (954): View more from Florida

  I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"

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• (682): View more from Texas

  Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.

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  You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes

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• (512): View more from Texas

  I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.

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  27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.

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• (916): View more from California

  I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom

  (862): View more from New Jersey

  I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE

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• (320): View more from Minnesota

  So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.

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