I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
