My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Randomize
