sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize