:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
