No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
she pinky promised me she was 18
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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