he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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