...so i touched it.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
